


His Curse

by Hestia



Category: The Avengers (2012)
Genre: Angst, Dark, Gen, Mental Abuse, Possession
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-03-17
Updated: 2012-03-17
Packaged: 2017-11-02 01:42:44
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,292
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/363616
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hestia/pseuds/Hestia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Loki is not entirely who he seems to be.</p><p>Personal head canon as to why he went from being really jealous of Thor to evil ass of evil in 2sec flat. Movie!verse.<br/>It's gen but feel free to see some possible Loki/Thor if you want to, I sure did.<br/>It's quite dark and depressing and focus on Loki.</p>
            </blockquote>





	His Curse

**Author's Note:**

> Beta by the lovely [Sweetestel](http://archiveofourown.org/users/sweetestel). Any renaming mistakes are entirely mine. Please note that neither of us are native speakers.
> 
> Takes place during (post?) the Avengers but I guess it's an AU 'cause obviously I don't know what the Avengers will be about since it's not out yet. Loki has been on Earth for months.  
> Not my first fanfiction but first time posting on AO3! I hope you'll enjoy this.

 

 

If someone had asked or if he had had enough control to explain, Loki would have told everyone that all this time he had been possessed, condemned to be locked inside his own body, screaming but unable to be heard by those he loved the most.

Sometimes, as he was forced to watch the pain the monster he had become was inflicting upon his own brother, he couldn't help but think he somehow deserved all this. It was the price he had to pay for playing with forces that weren't his to master in the first place. It was the price of jealousy.

Every time, he thought losing his brother, his family to become this, to have one more harmless prank to play, wasn't worth it. And if he could control the beast for a second he would tell Thor… But all he could do was watching the blade as it entered his sibling’s body once again. He knew it wouldn't kill the mighty god but the pain and the silent pleading for it to stop in his brother’s eyes was enough to make him scream internally. The beast laughed at him and grinned at Thor.

“Just a friendly reminder so you understand why I don’t like it when you break my toys”, the monster whisper in Thor’s ear.

It took a step back and turned toward the sky. It could ear Iron Man approaching fast. Thor was on his knees, unable to move or speak.

“Sorry brother but it looks like I need to go”, the beast said.

Loki tensed as he felt the monster wasn't done yet. It put its hand on the blade handle and waited a few seconds so that Iron Man was close enough to see him clearly but still not close enough to do him any harm. It smirked at the armor and removed the blade slowly, twisting just a little to tear the skin further apart. It didn't even cared enough to look back at Thor, who just closed his eyes and waited for his little brother to be done with him. The beast disappeared right before Iron Man landed.

Without the support of the magic binds Loki had used to keep his brother upright and silent, Thor fell toward the ground, exhausted. Tony barely had time to catch him before Thor’s head hit the ground. Even under a clouded night sky Tony could clearly evaluate the damages thanks to the armor. A quick scan told him Thor wasn't injured enough to be in serious danger but the billionaire knew first hand that the blade had been magically enhanced to make the pain a lot stronger than it should have been, strong enough to make the god pass out. Thor had a lot of shallow and deep cuts all over his body and Loki had given him a broken nose as well but the Asgardian was strong and would heal quickly.

// Iron Man to Captain America. Loki escaped but I’ve got the big guy. He’s a bit beaten up but nothing he won’t shake off in a few days.//

//Okay Iron Man, bring him home, we’ll meet you there. We’re almost done. Captain’s out.//

 

°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°

 

The beast left some freedom to Loki sometimes when they were alone. To Loki’s knowledge it was only because his distress amused the monster.

“Why? **”** , Loki asked once again, weakly.

“You know why.”

“Haven’t I paid enough since my brother’s coronation? I lost his love, my family, my home. How long will you keep destroying everything in my name, how long do I have to pay for my mistakes?”

“As long as it entertains me, Loki.” After a small pause the beast talked again. “But aren't you happy? Didn't you want some chaos to ruin your brother’s big day?”

“I only wanted a bit of fun, to teach him a lesson of humility. I never wanted all this!”

“Hush now, my small one. I don’t want to have this conversation with you again. It’s pathetic and it doesn't amuse me. You wanted chaos, you called for me and I have served you well. Be glad.”

“This is not what I wished for!” Loki screamed with rage.

“But as they say here on Midgard, careful was you wish for, little trickster. The one who  _spreads_ chaos will only receive chaos in return.”

“Please stop it”, the god pleaded with a weak voice once again.

“Why should I?”

“Because I love my brother” Loki whispered.

The beast then laughed with all it scold heart. For all it had done in its existence, breaking Loki’s will was what it considered one of its master piece. Reducing a god to a pleading little child brought it an intense satisfaction. It comforted the monster in its idea that it made the right choice when it pursued Loki.

The beast had seen a crack in the trickster’s heart, some brotherly rivalry that had turned into just enough jealousy for it to feed. Through this crack it had crawled under Loki’s skin and whispered words of hate and enviousness to the god until he surrendered to his jealousy and left the beast take a sit upon his heart.

The beast didn't usually stay  _in a prey_ that long, just enough to destroy their life and the lives of those they loved the most, but it had been months since he took control of the trickster, since Thor had been banished and Loki had been left alone and vulnerable enough to surrender to it. And this peculiar prey had brought it more pleasure than any other it had hunted in centuries. This little god was skilled in the art of magic and words, two things the monster liked to work with the most. Loki being the god of mischief and an excellent liar, shifty and suspicious in everybody’s eyes, it hadn't been difficult to impersonate him without rising suspicions. Not because Loki had a black heart, on the contrary he loved his family in his own already twisted way, but because everybody was ready to believe so.

O the irony. In the end, Loki’s love for a little evil had been his downfall. No one had even stopped one second to think he would have never truly hurt anyone like this, least of all his brother. His madness and hate had just seemed the next logical step to everyone. No one had seen past the mischief, no one had ever really try to understand what was lying behind them.

And when the beast sat upon the throne, everyone saw Loki while he could only scream in silence and scream some more as the monster sent the Destroyer to kill Thor. Everyone had only seen what was lying on the surface but no one had heard the truth behind Loki’s words of hate.

The beast kept on laughing while the memories flowed back to both of them and Loki cried like he never cried in all his centuries. All he wished for was to tell Thor that the last thing he said to him, before the beast took complete control over Loki, was true, that despite being envious, Loki had waited for Thor’s coronation too. He wanted to tell him how sorry he was his jealousy had become this. He wanted Thor to know how much he hated the pain he was putting his brother, Asgard and Midgard through. He wanted to say sorry so badly.

But all he could do was curl up into a ball inside his own mind. All he was able to do was to sob until no tears were left to spare while hearing the beast laugh some more at his misery.

Hate, silence, pain and chaos were his companions now.

That was Loki’s curse.

**Author's Note:**

> So to explain the context a little bit, I always found it strange in the movie how they developed Loki ‘cause he went from being a "little bit jealous" to being THE evil ass of evil. And then I saw that extended scene between Frigga and Loki and it made a lot more sense. Right after Loki got Gungnir, you can see him clearly go from confused to evil (Tom Hiddeston was so perfect during this scene, pity it wasn't included). So now that you read the story, in my personal head canon that’s the exact moment when the beast took over completely because Loki was too lost, too confused, too sad (about Odin, Thor and the truth about his birth), before that the beast could only whisper hate to Loki and that explain the rest of his reaction during the movie.  
> Anyway, thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed it!


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